oh hai crispin, happy birthday

here is your surprise party:
come in
everyone you've ever known or will know or wont know is here
it is a fancy dress party
the theme is:
sad executives
the drinks are:
bacardiribena
i will get you a water now
look, sarah is over there
her nipples...
sit down
the house band
(they are called 'everything you've ever wanted to happen can happen tonight if you just calm down')
are going to play a song now
 crispin born feat lil wayne by brooksben
good job band
my toe sure is tapping
um
do you want some hot wings
or peanuts
or lemon
okay
time to dance?
okay
you're right
this is going to be hilarious

that was fun
time for a 'stiff' drink now i guess
(undiluted lime cordial)
there is someone here, crispin,
who has got something he wants to read for you
go on mate
dont be shy


Birthday Wish

It’s your birthday time again;
It’s true; there’s no denying,
Another year has come and gone;
You know that I’m not lying.

So for you, the birthday person,
Here’s what I want to say:
I hope this birthday’s the best one yet,
In every delightful way.

So happy birthday to you.
Have lots of birthday fun!
May your birthday wishes all come true,
Even if you have a ton.

By Karl Fuchs
that was great karlreally nice jobwhat a voice you haveit is like plywood or something else great like thatthe atmosphere in here is greati know it's only the village hall buti mean it's the people rightnot the placehehe look at amandaher feet look like dead sealsokaythe house band are getting ants in their pantstime for another song band  i want to spend the rest of forever looking for a bowling alley with you but not finding one by brooksben woahthose guys are going to be hugeyou mark my mouthit is getting latebring down the lightsspeechspeechspeechohseems like everyone is just a bit sad or maybe tired nowwe should lie downwe can just go under these plastic tables and sleep foreverthis is nicetop and tailgood morninghappy birthday mate